Recap

 Okay, it's time for a recap episode.

It's been four years since my last post, which was also a recap episode... I really haven't been keeping up with this blog. Oh well. Not like anybody reads this.

There's a lot to go over since last time, so I'm just gonna rush through. No formatting, short sentences, in the approximate order they occurred. Can't remember all of it exactly.

I bought a car, my first time doing so. Got more or less out of my depression. Mom was still sick. I started flying and racing drones. I got a new job, left my part time one, and moved out of my parents house and back to Michigan. Full time engineering job, my own apartment, etc. Mom died. I stopped flying drones. I started getting in to VR. I started having extreme anxiety at work. They fired me, exactly a year since I started. I fell into another depression. Unemployed and depressed for six months, until I maxed out my credit cards on rent and ran out of money. Played the shit out of a couple games for months, then just stopped. Finally got my shit together, got a new job. Got really into VR, then stopped playing, then got into it again. Committed to moving closer to work, then they fired me, six months after I started. Out of work, and out of my apartment. Crashed on a friend's couch for three months, during which time I found another job. Moved into a new place of my own. Work going reasonably well.

2020 happened.

Got back into VR in a big way, dancing in a virtual club. Started struggling at work, similar to before, but managed to not fall apart like last time. Got a little better, got a little worse. Then got a lot worse. Still holding together at work, but having no motivation at all at home. Bad ADHD and executive dysfunction. Lost interest in VR. Gained an interest in ant keeping, found a few queens to start my own colonies. Started getting more depressed. Friends noticed and took some extreme measures to make me take care of myself... Finally made appointments to get professional help. Slowly getting active in the VR club again, but not quite back the way I was before. Started some depression meds, though I'm not sure if they're what I need. 

And... I think that's it, at least all I can think of to include without going into more detail. Still started putting a bit too much detail in the end there... but I don't care enough to go back and rewrite it.

A few things of major significance... But most of it is pretty normal or inconsequential. Don't really know how I feel about it, or how I'm doing now, or anything like that. But at least I know one thing, and this phrase has become a bit of a mantra for me...

I am here.